This bombing has put me in a panic state. I think "HOLY CRAP! Where can you go now?" Apparently; movie theaters, elementary schools, colleges, office buildings, and now Marathons are potential sites for violence.
I don't like thinking that way thought, I hate a victim mentality, but I can't help it, because every single day I'm schlepping 3 kids around that I love, and the powerlessness that one must feel when you are involved in that kind of senseless violence hits me hard.
I told my husband last night, "No matter how tough and protective I am, there would be nothing I could do." That is the worst feeling. You want to think, if you love your family, you can keep them safe. But that is not so.
I also was thinking, SHIT, I don't want to die in some stupid-crap bombing and then SOMEONE ELSE would raise my kids! NO NO NO NO NO! But there is nothing you can do, it's all out of your control, this feeling is AWFUL!!
When it's warm I usually do at least 1 running race a month. I'm not a record breaker, I just do them for fun. There is INTENSE CAMARADERIE, there is SUPER POSITIVE ENERGY. Why the hell did someone have to mess this up?
All races that I do have the revenue go to charity, I worry now that people are going to be scared to sign up for them (myself included), and that charities and organizations that need cash aren't going to be getting it.
So yeah, next week I fly into Boston and I'm going to be about 2 blocks from the finish-line bombing site. I was SO EXCITED to go to Boston. A city I've never been to. I don't want to be jumping at every sharp sound.
Years ago I was in Chicago for Spring Break and 3 times in one day, I had near death experiences. I was on the sidewalk under the Hancock Building when glass fell and killed people. I was on the EL when Sarin gas was released and then finally I walked into a 7-11 seconds after it was robbed at gunpoint. Final Destination? Jeez.
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